I had to ponder a bit about what I would like to contribute to this month’s theme on ‘risk’. This is purely because I have shared a lot of personal insights and experiences about my life with all my stories on ‘OutTales around the Fire’, which I have perceived as ‘positive risk’ taking, because despite my anxiety around the positive or negative comments my stories may generate, the sharing of the stories has been an outlet for me and quite cathartic; and I am sharing my stories with people who may have similar experiences; and the audience of the site (I presume) is mainly same gender loving people who are also sharing their stories to provide insight for others in this wide diaspora of same gender loving peoples. More
Taking the risk to share my lifestyle choice with others
30 Jan 2012 4 Comments
in Risk Tags: Bisexual, Facebook, Gay, Nigeria, Risk
To risk or not to risk?
20 Jan 2012 3 Comments
in Risk Tags: Amsterdam, Gay, Lagos, Nigeria, Risks, Storytelling
On Friday 9th December 2011, I attended a storytelling night at Mezrab in Amsterdam. A fellow storyteller had mentioned the gathering and as a lover of stories, how could I resist!
As I had never been to the Mezrab before, nor knew the potential size of the crowd, my intention was simply to sit back, listen and enjoy a Friday night-out. On getting to the event, the friend who invited me insisted that l take the floor at some stage during the evening to tell a story; but I was unsure. More
Taking the risk to be myself
10 Jan 2012 1 Comment
in Risk Tags: Authenticity, Gay, Risk
As each year goes by, I have begun to notice that I feel more comfortable in my own skin, and in my interactions with the world. Yes, I still get those moments where I find that I am over compromising to fit into the demands of another. However, those moments are no longer the norm of my life. I am noticing as the years go by, that I am taking more risks at being myself.
In a recent post, I shared my reflections on ‘being different and the journey towards self-acceptance’. The fact of the matter is, for a long time that second wolf I talked about was running my life – ‘the wolf of conforming and hiding, in order to feel a sense of validation and acceptance’. The wolf of compromise, and playing small. More
Share Your OutTale
10 Jan 2012 Leave a comment
in General
We would very much like to hear your story as we explore a variety of themes during our journey together.
To share your story or suggest a theme for the month, send your email to outtales@yahoo.com.
Do include the title of your story in the header of your email. Stories can be submitted in written, video or audio form. If you do not wish your name to feature as the author of the story you submit, please do say so in your email and suggest a pseudonym.
Don’t forget to join us around the Fire on Facebook or follow us on Twitter.
My Sexuality is a Human Right
06 Jan 2012 3 Comments
in My Sexuality is a Human Right Tags: Africa, Gay, LGBTI, Nigeria
The removal of fuel subsidy is the latest news gripping the citizens of Nigeria. So for now, that homophobic piece of legislation – The Same Sex Marriage (Prohibition) Bill – appears to be the last thing on the mind of everyday Nigerians (as it should be!).
Nonetheless, it is important for us as same gender loving people to remain vigilant and not be distracted. We must continue to remind our family, friends, neighbours and the Legislators, that our Sexuality is a Human Right, and we will not be distracted from standing up for our fundamental right.
Fellow blogger, Adaku Utah at SouLar Bliss, recently shared a prayer ‘in solidarity with fellow queer Nigerian kin…… as a remedy to heal all that has attempted to silence our powerful selves’. With her kind permission, I share the prayer with you: More
My Sexuality is a Human Right
03 Jan 2012 Leave a comment
in My Sexuality is a Human Right Tags: Africa, Gay, LGBTI, Nigeria
I attended seven weddings in 2011. The people who got married were my friends, and many of us gathered to celebrate their joy at finding a partner for the journey of life.
I watched them take their vows, looking lovingly into each other’s eyes: “to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, forsaking all others till death do us part”. Those are strong words and for each man and woman who took those vows before me, I believe they were telling the truth. More
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