First Time on vacation with myself

30 Jun 2011 6 Comments

by OutTales in First Time Tags:

I’ve always loved the adventure of travel and could not wait to grow up, leave home and head out to see the world. By 2002, I had been to a number of places in the US, Latin America, Africa and Europe.  I had been to these places either with others or knew someone in those cities whom I could stay with during my visit. There were so many other places that I wanted to visit and for a long time I decided to put them on hold and wait for my Mr. Right to show-up and then we would travel the globe together, whilst having a series of adventures. But alas, that was not the case; not in 2002 anyway!

When yet another relationship ended in Spring 2002, I found myself wondering whether I would indeed get to meet that illusive Mr. Right. I started to consider all the things that I had been saving to do with a partner and wondered whether I would get to do them at all.  Up until the end of that relationship, the idea of going on vacation by myself, to a place where I knew no one was the furthest thing from my mind. I had heard of people who did such things and at the time I used to feel that it was something sad and did not wish to entertain the possibility. More

My First Time with another

23 Jun 2011 Leave a comment

by OutTales in First Time Tags: ,

The year was 1984. Buhari and Idiagbon were in power, they had just launched ‘War against Indiscipline’. The Naira was exchanging for ₦50.00 – $1.00 on the black market. A bag of 50kg rice was about ₦100.00 and the minimum wage was around ₦300.00 a month. It was in Owerri, eastern Nigeria. It was in boarding school.

I was studying for my ‘A’ Levels. It was within a few weeks of starting at the school. It was my first time away from home. I had lived at home while in secondary school in Lagos, but for my ‘A’ Levels, my parents decided I would get a better education in one of the best schools in the country, in the east. They were right, in more ways than one. More

My First Time experience of being with a man

18 Jun 2011 2 Comments

by OutTales in First Time Tags: , , ,

I was born in the UK to parents of Nigerian descent who came to the UK to study. My parents separated, moved to Nigeria in 1975 and left us with relatives in the UK who eventually sent us to live with my dad in Nigeria in August 1977. I came back to the UK finally in December 1989. My first same gender sexual liaison was in 1993. I had in fact been married for 4 years by this time. I got married in December 1989 before finally moving to the UK. I am still happily married despite going on a difficult journey to accept my sexuality. This personal journey has had a negative and in some cases positive impact on a number of people lives, but it was a journey that I needed to go through. More

Now is always a First Time

17 Jun 2011 Leave a comment

by OutTales in First Time, Reflections

Beautiful words from a dear friend,

My First Time in East Africa

15 Jun 2011 1 Comment

by OutTales in First Time Tags: ,

In January 2011, I met a nice guy through a mutual friend, he was from Kenya. I found my interest in Kenya increasing as we gradually became acquainted and he talked about his home town, along with the beauty of his country. During this period, it dawned on me that even though I was from West Africa and had lived there for a number of years, I had never been to any part of East Africa. Over the forthcoming weeks, I got to know my new friend better over Skype and so in March, I started to consider the idea of a visit; besides we were developing an interest in each other, or so I thought! More

First Time at a Gay Bar

12 Jun 2011 Leave a comment

by OutTales in First Time Tags: ,

On returning from a local gay bar in Amsterdam a week or so ago, I sat round my kitchen table with the friend I had been out with chatting away about everything and nothing. As we savored our Moroccan mint tea, we walked down the roads of our various ‘first time’ experiences. Oh, how we laughed and cried at where life had taken us. It was soothing to reminisce over times long gone by, as I pondered over the innocence of my youth.

Yes, that certainly was a period when ‘first times’ were an everyday occurrence. I talked about how going to the bar we had just been was now a non-event and how in December 1994 that was such a novel experience and one that I still remembered whenever I was in the Soho Square area of London. More

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