The theme for May is ‘Coming Out’

Over the past couple of months, I have found myself caught up in conversations on the issue of ‘coming out’, or coincidentally, simply coming across a variety of articles on the matter.

Opinions have been diverse on whether ‘coming out’ is a necessary step in the journey of every same gender loving person and in some cases, the views have been that it is a western idea which is not always culturally compatible across the globe. There have also been some who have said ‘I don’t hide it. I simply don’t wear it on my shoulder. And if I was asked, I will tell’.

Every same gender loving person has a story to tell around coming out. From, choosing to come out to a parent, a friend, a work colleague or a stranger on a train. Or choosing not to come out when faced with the question from a family member, an old school friend or the cashier behind the till who asks whether the item we placed on the counter was for ‘your girlfriend’. The scenarios are endless.

What I have come to learn over the years, is that coming out is not a one-off event. For most same gender loving people, it is an ongoing journey; where depending on each situation or encounter, we get to decide whether to come out or not. And so, we may choose not to correct the cashier behind the till by saying ‘boyfriend’, and in some cases we might.

Coming out can also take many forms, and not simply be about sexuality. After all, our sexuality is only one aspect of our humanity. In our life journey, coming out might also relate to – religion or spirituality, HIV status, mental health issues or one of many other categories.

So what’s your story around coming out or not coming out. As a same gender loving person, what does coming out mean to you and what impact has your decision – to be out or not – had  on your life. What was it like when you came out to a certain person? What was it like when faced with the opportunity to come out and you chose not to do so. What happened? All stories on the subject matter are welcomed.

What’s your story? To share it, send your email to

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